Time and Dirt
(First Day -- Previous Day -- Day 34 -- Next Day)
Day 34
Heliopause Colony on Planet Vertumna, Medbay
“Solane... hello? How... how are you today?
...
Oh, you’re looking at the plants to your side, and Tiki is doing the same. The pelargonium is still hanging in there, with its flower head still forming a nice hemisphere and its individual flowers still the same bright red... as your eyes... The ...
...
Wait, you’ve been crying... What’s wrong?”
- “You”
You weren’t even looking at me. And I didn’t know what to say.
...
“Oh. Sorry... I’m sorry, Solane, I ...
Sh-should I leave?”
All I could do was stammer. There was nothing I wanted less than leaving you, but if it was what you wanted, I couldn’t really argue, I thought.
But then you turned to me and with maybe the deepest frown I had ever seen on you started sobbing, first softly, but soon loudly the way you hadn’t in years. Even at most funerals you always just seemed so numb...
“Stay!” you said and it sounded so desperate I was wondering what hurt you so much, until I remembered something.
- “Of course I will, Solane. As long as you need me to... Oh wait, Dr. Instance told me you had been ... wondering the whole day where I was, calling out my name repeatedly. That must be why she had sent Tang to come after me as well...
...
Hey, do you want to hear where I was?
... Yes? I think I saw you nod!
Aww, you’ve finally stopped sobbing.
Okay, so Rex had told me Nomi-Nomi had been trying to find more people to watch one of their favorite holoseries with them after their work was done for the day, and as he was still busy asked me if I wanted to do that. I felt bad about rejecting their suggestion the last time two weeks ago or so and so went with them even if I kept thinking I need all the time I have for either the plants or you.
And then watching it was so uncomfortable, too... Some talking Earth animal was like, rude the entire time and barely ever understood what he was doing until after he had already driven away all his friends and they just politely, or... less politely told him they no longer wanted him in his life after years of trying to stay friends. And then he lost his home and was captured by... soldiers or something like that. It was horrible, I have no idea why anyone would like to see that.
Maybe I could suggest an Earth nature documentary next time, but I feel like that might get dismissed as ‘boring’... Not by you, of course, since you apparently want to get back to observing and researching the plants already, huh?”
Wait...
Hey, is it true ... that you had turned towards the flower because their sight and especially smell was one thing that felt familiar where everything around you was maybe strange unsettling? I didn’t think about it at the time and never asked, but now it feels like that to me. Like flowers still made sense to you when nothing else did... I probably would have been thes same. Now I wish I had said it then instead of going on that weird rant...
“Ah, I don’t get what everyone sees in these holovideos... Like some are funny or interesting, but they always annoy me at how they are showing me something I can’t grab or even touch myself. And so I just have to sit there and try to understand things from a distance, like in school. So annoying.
Actually, you can’t even ask questions, you’d have to hope you can find other holovideos who can answer those and then you can ... people like that??
...
Oh, sorry, I shouldn’t be ranting like that... I already promised that and you really need the rest, right?
I don’t want to upset you, it’s just all so frustrating. Why isn’t anyone interested in like, the cool things many plants we have here can do, or watching them grow? They allow you to be directly part of their life, and the Earth plants even *need* your help. ... And so do I. I just wish they would sometimes invite themselves over to offer some aid, then we probably wouldn’t need the soldiers there so much either.
Oh yeah, they could even watch some holovideos about that, right? You liked some of those about botany and agriculture a lot, some that were actually really helpful. I guess they can sometimes really tell you about what people around you couldn’t talk about... I have no clue how you had the patience to find them and sit through them, though.
Maybe I should invite them myself but they never seemed interested, so...
Tiki, do you have any advice? ... Ah, you’re just looking at me with the same curiosity I wish more people had to the world.
...
Is something wrong, Solane? You... you have a pained expression on your face. Maybe I should really talk about lighter topics.
Like, I could tell you how I felt the whole night after leaving Medbay, but I think I’d better not do that. Don’t worry, I’ll talk to the sunflower in my room instead. She’ll understand. I have a tiny tree that can give some wisdom as well, remember? A miniature version of the huge mushwood trees.
I’d sing you a song about them, maybe it’d put you at ease, but I sadly can’t think of any right now... Maybe you’d also enjoy just hearing me talk about what’s been happening to them outside? I know you always liked to observe the passage of season on them.
Like, they’re all different in how they show it, the different kinds of mushwoods we have here. But that’s what made it so interesting, right?
At least if you look at them in nature, rather than trying to study holographic models.
... oh, sorry, I shouldn’t go on another rant again. Uh, just give me a moment, Solane, okay?
...
Hah, ... wouldn’t it be nice if we could just sit under a mushtree again...
...”
Then I saw you frowning and just looking at me sad and thought you probably could sense how ... exhausted I felt. Like I had run across the entire colony twice, or worked the whole day from morning to evening, when it was just the early afternoon, I think. Of which I had spent so much just sitting on the floor, too!
And I couldn’t even bring myself to tell you, Solane, just couldn’t...
“But we’ll get there soon enough. And then you’ll see them again, trunks already tall and slim after growing for over half a year, their tops turned that deep, rich purple, drooping towards the ground, if not outright melting as their pseudofoliage turns increasingly to goo.
You... you have to make sure to sit close to the trunk to not get that stuff on you. Or just not mind if it does! Of course your mother *did* mind, mine just grinned at me and let me wash it out myself. Heh.
Yeah, you remember, right? Your smile tells me as much!
A lot of times we were asked why we couldn’t sit down under those mushtrees that don’t melt. But those are kind of less fun, aren’t they? They don’t change as much. Just grow and get slim over the course of the year like all of them.
Ugh, why I’m getting so tired already? I thought I had gotten enough sleep for once last night. I’m sorry, we’ll continue with the physical therapy tomorrow, I hope that’s alright. I mean, technically you already did some today yourself already when you turned yourself over to the plants next to you. You’re making so much progress... I’m so happy to see that.
Let Tiki bring you some flowers to smell while I’m gone, okay?”